


Noble Idiocracy

by sixthofjune



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-08
Updated: 2017-10-08
Packaged: 2019-01-10 16:48:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12303345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sixthofjune/pseuds/sixthofjune
Summary: Sunggyu finds Sungyeol three years after he disappeared.





	Noble Idiocracy

**Author's Note:**

> Random rambles that came about during a long flight. Unedited, so do pardon any grammatical errors or incoherence.

The human brain tends to associate sensual experiences to certain memories. Whether it’s a particular melody, scent, or the sight of a particular street—the brain would trigger and bring out a piece of memory that has been tagged to it. Perhaps, this is that function of the brain that brings out the feeling of nostalgia in people.

Sungyeol wished he could shut down this function of his brain. The familiar smell of the sea, the gentle breeze hitting against his face, can of beer in hand, and the same melody playing in his iPod—it is the perfect combination to trigger a wave of nostalgia in him.

He hated the feeling of reminiscing something that can never be recreated, but at the same time, he was afraid that if he did not regularly bring back the memories and feelings surrounding that place, he would eventually forget, though he wasn’t sure why he was so afraid of forgetting either.

Sungyeol cursed silently under his breath when he realized he had emptied his last can of beer. He sighed as he stood up, intending to get another few cans from the convenient store nearby.

He barely took two steps when he heard a voice that caused him to freeze in his tracks.

“Yah.”

He knew exactly who that voice belonged to—Kim Sunggyu. He never expected to hear that voice there and then. He wanted to run, but his legs refused to move. His head was spinning, a thousand different questions running through his mind at the same time.

“Yah.”

Sungyeol didn’t respond. He shut his eyes tight, and took a deep breath and walked straight, away from the voice.

“Are you running away again?” The voice asked calmly, so calm it sent shudders down Sungyeol’s spine.

Sungyeol pursed his lips tight. “What are you doing here?”

“What are _you_ doing here then?”

Sungyeol shrugged, “It makes more sense for me to be here than for you to be.”

“Whatever you say, Yeol.” Sunggyu said, clearly not bothered by what Sungyeol said. “Yah, are you just going to keep talking to me with your back facing me?”

 “Well, no. In fact, I’m leaving. Bye.” Sungyeol snapped defensively as he walked away calmly—or at least he hoped he appeared to be calm.

With every step that he took, Sunggyu took two. It wasn’t long before the person ended up standing in front of his eyes. Sungyeol glared, avoiding eye contact. “What do you want?”

Sunggyu stared at him intently, keeping quiet.

“Seems like you don’t want anything, leave me alone then.”

“Answers.” Sunggyu said, and Sungyeol swears that he heard a tinge of sadness masked behind the calm. “Why did you disappear?”

Before Sungyeol could say anything, Sunggyu continued, “Don’t try brushing me off, Yeol. Don’t you think you should at least be fair to me?”

Sungyeol looked away. After much contemplation, he decided on this answer, “It’s better for you that way. That’s all you need to know.”

“Who do you think you are to decide that it is better for me that way?” Sunggyu frowned, his face a myriad of emotions.

“Gyu,” Sungyeol swallowed dryly, and for the first time that night, he said his name. “It’s all over. It doesn’t matter anymore, does it? You should go back.”

That was it. That was the last straw.

“Fuck you, Lee Sungyeol.” Sunggyu hollered. “Do you really think you are in the position to say that it doesn’t matter anymore? Do you know the kind of hell you put me through? Three fucking years, Lee Sungyeol. Three fucking years trying to find you, and now you are telling me it is all over. Fuck you, Yeol. What were we?”

Sungyeol was taken aback by Sunggyu’s outburst.

“Gyu, shut up. Not here,” Sungyeol said coldly.

“You really think that is what is important now? Lee Sungyeol, this is the exact reason why you left, wasn’t it?” Sunggyu questioned. Somewhere deep inside, he knew. He just needed to hear it directly from Sungyeol.

 ***

Three years ago, after Sunggyu’s goodbye stage for his debut single, he returned to an empty house. All that was left was a note that read ‘ _Gyu, congrats on your debut. I’m sure your music will reach more and more people, and you will grow to become the brightest start in the sky. Don’t worry about me, and don’t look for me. Love, Yeol.’_

Sunggyu didn’t know what to do. He frantically searched for Sungyeol. He had tried calling Sungyeol, but the number had been terminated, and all his SNS accounts were deactivated. He went to places Sungyeol would have gone, he called Sungyeol’s friends and family—he did whatever was in his means, but it almost seemed like Sungyeol vanished from the surface of the Earth.

Sunggyu broke. He was just getting excited about finally realizing his dream, but never did he expect that Sungyeol would suddenly disappear.

It didn’t take Sunggyu long before realizing the reason for Sungyeol’s disappearance. As he recalls their time together the few months leading up to Sungyeol’s disappearance, he realized the telltale signs started after the night at the beach, where Sunggyu first let Sungyeol listen to the demo track of the song he wrote and told him that he finally got signed by a record label. That night, Sunggyu felt like his life was complete- he was on his way to realizing his dreams, and he had Sungyeol right next to him.

Perhaps it was because Sunggyu was in that constant state of bliss for the next few months that the usually sharp male did not pick up the telltale signs that Sungyeol was sending out. Sungyeol was unusually affectionate when they were home, and had started resisted going on dates. A few times, Sunggyu woke up to see Sungyeol crying in his sleep, though Sungyeol brushed them off as a bad dream.

Sunggyu knew Sungyeol well enough to guess that Sungyeol made the decision to leave so that Sunggyu will not be embroiled in any sort of romantic scandal.  

That didn’t stop Sunggyu from trying to find Sungyeol though. In the three years, short of hiring a private investigator, Sunggyu had tried all sorts of things to locate Sungyeol. He even talked about Sungyeol at his concerts, asking his fans to help find him, but to no avail. 

“You really think that is what is important now? Lee Sungyeol, this is the exact reason why you left, wasn’t it?”

Sungyeol hesitated, looking everywhere but at Sunggyu. He knew there was no point lying. Sunggyu knew him well enough to know if he was lying. “Why do you ask when you already know the answer?”

“Yeol, please. You know I--” Sunggyu rolled his eyes, sighing. He looked at Sungyeol intensely, pleading “Yeol, look at me. In the eyes. Please.”

Sungyeol resisted. But with Sunggyu’s pleas, he hesitantly looked up, his gaze uncertain.

Sunggyu cautiously continued, “What are we now?”

“Strangers,” Sungyeol immediately averted his gaze as he answered. That was Sungyeol for you- when his defense mechanism kicks in, he speaks without thinking and usually doesn’t mean what he says. Sunggyu knows. Which is why he didn’t respond as he waited for Sungyeol to continue.

It took a while, but Sungyeol eventually turned to look Sunggyu in his eyes, quietly responding, “I don’t know.”

“Do you still love me?” Sunggyu threaded the question cautiously, but firmly.

“Gyu. You know you shouldn’t—“

“Yeol, please. Do you really think I’ll be truly happy if you are not by my side when I’m working towards my dream? I’m pretty sure you have seen me on stage, do you really think I’m doing better without you? Can’t you hear it, Yeol? My performance has been soulless. Even if the entire world does not sense that, you should be able to.”

“But— Gyu, you don’t understand,“ Sungyeol was exasperated. “What if you have to give up your career because of me? What if shit happens and people find out? Gyu, I’m not all that important. You are doing well even without me.“

Sungyeol never answered his question directly, but Sunggyu got his answer.

He took a step closer to Sungyeol, raising his head slightly as he placed his lips against Sungyeol’s. He doesn’t move to kiss Sungyeol, and waits for the other boy to make the move.

Sungyeol froze. As Sungyeol attempted to take a step back, Sunggyu’s arms snaked around Sungyeol’s waist and pushed their bodies closer.

Sunggyu pulled his lips slightly from Sungyeol’s, staring deeply into the other’s eyes. The gaze seemed like a trap for Sungyeol as he stood frozen, his face burning and breath hitching, unable to avert Sunggyu’s gaze.

“Fuck you, Gyu.” Sungyeol muttered as he leaned in to again close the distance between their lips, taking Sunggyu’s lips between his for a slow and passionate kiss.

***

“How did you know I’ll be here?” Sungyeol asked as he looked into the distant sea, Sunggyu sitting by his side, each with a can of beer.

“I didn’t. Just so happened I needed to find the feeling I had when I first debuted, I felt like I was forgetting why I even started--” Sunggyu smiled slightly. “But hey, I found more than just that.”

Sungyeol smiled as they sat in silence. There was so much to catch up on, but all they wanted to do was to enjoy each other’s company at the moment.

“Hey, did you ever date anyone else the past three years?” Sungyeol suddenly broke the silence.

Sunggyu snorted. “Well, I promised a certain Lee Sungyeol that I’ll never cheat on him. And although that certain Lee Sungyeol disappeared, we technically did not break up. And Kim Sunggyu being Kim Sunggyu, keeps promises. What about you, Mister?”

“Yeah, whatever.” Sungyeol said playfully, a wide grin plastered on his face before shaking his head. “Couldn’t get a certain Sunggyu out of my life, especially when his songs are haunting me everywhere on the streets.”

Sunggyu laughed.

“Hey, Gyu. I’m sorry for being stupid.”

“You better be. Don’t you ever dare do this again.”

“I won’t.” Sungyeol whined. “Also…I love you.”

Sunggyu turned to look at Sungyeol. He doesn’t say anything, but the look on his face tells it all. _I love you too, Lee Sungyeol._


End file.
